Even When Your Humility is Humiliated

I have had so many complaints about life recently and in the last year that I think this blog needs to be renamed for the time being "Castle on the Corner of Complaints".

The water heater breaks, the air conditioning on the van breaks, the door on the van breaks, the sprinklers break, the garage door breaks, the clutch breaks, the fence breaks, the roof breaks, the awning breaks, the washing machine breaks, the heater at Christmas time breaks, (just to name a few) and my heart breaks for the life we used to live.  I loved that life and I was looking forward to the future and enjoying the present.  Having a husband become unemployed and going back to school for a few years surely was not part of that life I desired.  But it became so.

I have done more than my fair share of complaining, I just think, "why can't Heavenly Father make things just a little easier on us?" Why can't He make going to church easy and enjoyable? Why can't He just make my son a little less ornery and whiny? Why can't He protect everything from breaking when I know He knows we would have to use up what savings we have to get those things fixed?  Why can't He make it easier for me to see and talk to old friends and be around large groups of people who are happy?  And  then I realized right then when my humility was being humiliated that I had not been asking for help with any of those things.  My Heavenly Father knows what I need and want and He loves me so much that He gave me a gentle reminder to ask for them.  With all these things breaking, He reminds me that we have them, that we have a beautiful home and cars that get us to the places we need to go and that taking a cold shower helps us not be so hot while driving in the van.

It might take me some time to quit complaining, but He has given me the tools, such as prayer and scripture study to help me be grateful and enjoy the hard work I need to do during this time.  Prayer and patience is key to making it through.  I have hope and faith that our family will be blessed with a good job and with the enjoyment that comes with being around good friends, family, neighbors, and church members.  And I know we will have lots and lots of lessons learned.  And my son is already less ornery, which makes me less ornery, which I am oh so grateful for, cause I like the happy side of me.  So even when your humility is humiliated remember that you can turn to the Lord in prayer, He understands and will answer your prayers in ways you can't even imagine.

Do I Ever

Do you ever have one of those days where you nothing really bad happened, but you still feel like it wasn't a good day? Do you ever feel like you never ever ever want to exercise again? Do you ever feel like you just need a quiet house and all the time you want to do the things you want to do?  Do you ever feel like you just want someone to come into your life and take over the decision making and the house cleaning and the budgeting and the raising of the kids?  I sure do.

In A Day

1. Woke up on time
2. Showered
3. Got kids off to school with their teeth brushed.
4. Ate breakfast with Sam while watching cartoons.
5. Started cleaning the kitchen
5a. Watered the Peas at the Stake Garden
6. Cleaned Amy's home for 2 hours
7. Had lunch
8. Finished cleaning the kitchen
9. Emptied out some cupboards in the hallway that were used for housing board games
10. Put in the newly cleaned cupboards a few of the kitchen essentials.
11. Organized snack drawer and vacuumed out the crumbs and whatever else that was.
12. Made room in another cupboard so that we can store more food in the kitchen.
13. Threw away old nasty cleaning cloths.
14. Gave away the acrylic yarn to the thrift store.
15. Cleaned the front room, dining room, and then the bathrooms when the kids came home from school (it helps them enjoy school more)
16. Painted a book shelf bright blue with the help of Eme and Sam.
17. Sanded and cleaned the newly installed kitchen screen door that Mr. Jewels found on the street. I love free and it is perfect.
17a. Vacuumed the stairs
18. Prepared dinner and ate dinner
19. Finished knitting the scarf for Linda (ONE of my mother-in-laws)(mom's day gift)(yes I know it is summer, but she is always cold)
20. Started sweeping the back porch
21. Took the girlfriends home
22. Had prayer and put the kids to bed
23. Ran one and a half miles with Cindy
24. Talked with Tom, Joe, Mr. Jewels and Cindy about the goings on at the school
25. Finished watching Sherlock
26. Went to bed
 It was a wonderful day.

The Best of Me

Well, to start off I just need to say that I'm not the stay at home mom I was dreaming of becoming and I didn't realize it until a week ago when a friend of mine said to me "so, you've always worked". I will never be the mom next door who is home every day of the week with her children playing in the yard, or the mom who always gets to walk their kids to and from school, or the mom who sews cute outfits or finds the latest fashions for their kids, or the mom who spends time at the school volunteering in the classroom, or the mom who gets to take their child to the library for story time, or on long walks or runs in the nice jogging stroller. I will never be the mom who can crawl out of bed before her children wake up and make them breakfast. But I can be the mom to gather the children for prayer before they run off to school. I can be the mom to make them a nutritious dinner at night and talk about their day around the kitchen table. I can be the mom to show them how to work in the yard and clean the house and get their homework done. I can be the mom to help them get along with each other and their friends. I can be the mom to teach them the gospel of Jesus Christ and help them understand that keeping the commandments is most important. I can be the mom to teach them that marriage can be wonderful, magical, hard work and rewarding. I can be the mom who sacrifices her wants for the needs of the family. I can be the mom who loves their dad. I can be the mom who lets her children grow. I can be the mom who can give the best of me.